Thursday, July 24, 2003
I'm leaving on a jet plane...
Here is my address again:
Becky D.
SCC: WA 3
Northwest Youth Corps
2621 Augusta
Eugene, OR 97403
Send me lots of love.
Well, I'll see y'all in September. Sweet dreams.
Here is my address again:
Becky D.
SCC: WA 3
Northwest Youth Corps
2621 Augusta
Eugene, OR 97403
Send me lots of love.
Well, I'll see y'all in September. Sweet dreams.
Happy birthday to me.
29 more hours left of Becky in Troy. Eh, eh?
I really found myself missing Young Actor's Guild this evening. I feel out of place there, even more so than I did when I was there. I remembered that this will be my first non-YAG birthday in the past 9 years or so. Sigh.
It was really awesome hearing from Keren today. She sends her love to everyone (I hope everyone reads this, cause if not I'll feel dumb).
Csaba instant messaged me, too. I miss having him around. I'm sorry we never got to hang out before he left. Some other time, I suppose. I'm seriously considering trying out for a Player's show like he's been telling me to, if for nothing else than to see if I still enjoy performing. I guess we shall see what conclusions I draw while away from this world.
29 more hours left of Becky in Troy. Eh, eh?
I really found myself missing Young Actor's Guild this evening. I feel out of place there, even more so than I did when I was there. I remembered that this will be my first non-YAG birthday in the past 9 years or so. Sigh.
It was really awesome hearing from Keren today. She sends her love to everyone (I hope everyone reads this, cause if not I'll feel dumb).
Csaba instant messaged me, too. I miss having him around. I'm sorry we never got to hang out before he left. Some other time, I suppose. I'm seriously considering trying out for a Player's show like he's been telling me to, if for nothing else than to see if I still enjoy performing. I guess we shall see what conclusions I draw while away from this world.
Tuesday, July 22, 2003
Monday, July 21, 2003
 I am a subtle flavour, quiet and polite, gentle, almost ambient. My presence in crowds will often go unnoticed. Best not to spill me on your clothes though, I can leave a nasty stain. What Flavour Are You? |
Sunday, July 20, 2003
I think my mistake was in the planning. Not quite the right mix of people, not quite the right timing. Which isn't to say that everyone that was there wasn't awesome....It was cliquish. I'm afraid it might have been akward for some (including myself). I really hope it was fun anyhow.
Leaving feels right now. What I'd want to hang on to doesn't need the protection of proximity; what needs the protection of proximity probably isn't worth hanging on to. So it goes.
I love you.
Leaving feels right now. What I'd want to hang on to doesn't need the protection of proximity; what needs the protection of proximity probably isn't worth hanging on to. So it goes.
I love you.
GuaCeMoLE125 (10:37:07 AM): i can get you one of those burly men that comes in just tight pants and a bow tie and dances if you want
skye yes 681 (10:37:39 AM): ohhh will his name be dave shaver?
skye yes 681 (10:37:39 AM): ohhh will his name be dave shaver?
I want a ferret named Kitty.
...
Birthday party tomorrow! Come if you wanna! Three o'clock chez moi.
Bring a bathing suit.
...
Birthday party tomorrow! Come if you wanna! Three o'clock chez moi.
Bring a bathing suit.
Saturday, July 19, 2003
They Might Be Giants are way cool and fun! Hooray for The Egg! Hooray for accordians!
Friday, July 18, 2003
I could save the world like this.
Thursday, July 17, 2003
You're in the air.
(All day packing.)
(All day packing.)
Wednesday, July 16, 2003
Umakitty and the Tragedy of King Lear.
I sat outside to hear the laughter. I want to be inside it.
I'm excited. I'll survive any discomfort that comes from my new surroundings. There will be others in my boat. I'll sweat and ache and be alive, surrounded by life. For what it's worth, I will be wasting energy on something other than myself, and that will feel so good. I'll finally appreciate everything.
Eight days.
I sat outside to hear the laughter. I want to be inside it.
I'm excited. I'll survive any discomfort that comes from my new surroundings. There will be others in my boat. I'll sweat and ache and be alive, surrounded by life. For what it's worth, I will be wasting energy on something other than myself, and that will feel so good. I'll finally appreciate everything.
Eight days.
Tuesday, July 15, 2003
Yes, pop culture. VH1. I'm wasting my time.
Eh, eh, I don't know what to say.
Ten days and then I'm gone.
There's so much to do before I go, and I've not done any of it. Yuck yuck yuck.
(Do you recall?)
Eh, eh, I don't know what to say.
Ten days and then I'm gone.
There's so much to do before I go, and I've not done any of it. Yuck yuck yuck.
(Do you recall?)
Sunday, July 13, 2003
R.I.P. Huey and Talulah.
Saturday, July 12, 2003
I don't know why I'm so difficult to be around lately. I'm sorry I'm so unstable and high maintenance and moody and insensitive and insecure and whatever else I'm being. I'm living in a fucking fantasy world, and ignoring everything that might be important. I know I'm no help to anyone, and especially none to myself.
I guess my whole reason for wanting to leave was because these familiar faces are not interested in knowing anything more about me than they do (or assume they do). It's probably my own fault for not letting them. Obviously I'm a troubled little girl. I can't take these empty consolations. I'm sick of not being heard. I don't want to be scared anymore, but I wish someone would just admit that it's okay that I am.
I guess my whole reason for wanting to leave was because these familiar faces are not interested in knowing anything more about me than they do (or assume they do). It's probably my own fault for not letting them. Obviously I'm a troubled little girl. I can't take these empty consolations. I'm sick of not being heard. I don't want to be scared anymore, but I wish someone would just admit that it's okay that I am.
Friday, July 11, 2003
All you have to do is ask.
Thursday, July 10, 2003
Oh, hi. Oh.
A lot can happen in a year.
Dream: (Movie?) He is pushed from a window of a tall building with a faulty parachute. Falling helplessly, he punches a window. Two windows. He climbs inside.
Dream: They've poisoned me with glass powder (though the particles in my mouth feel like sand). It cuts my mouth. I try to spit the shards out, but there is more of it. I'm dying.
Dream: I'm pregnant.
A lot can happen in a year.
Dream: (Movie?) He is pushed from a window of a tall building with a faulty parachute. Falling helplessly, he punches a window. Two windows. He climbs inside.
Dream: They've poisoned me with glass powder (though the particles in my mouth feel like sand). It cuts my mouth. I try to spit the shards out, but there is more of it. I'm dying.
Dream: I'm pregnant.
Wednesday, July 09, 2003
Yay! I win!
Andrew is way boring when he's asleep.
Anyone wanna take a ride?
Andrew is way boring when he's asleep.
Anyone wanna take a ride?
I will fear no evil: for thou art with me...
I don't know and I don't know.
Seventeen days.
I don't know and I don't know.
Seventeen days.
Tuesday, July 08, 2003
"Put me down easy, Janie. Ah'm a cracked plate."
"Dear Dr. Hardy,
I was driving in my car at about 3 AM early Friday morning. I was making my way through the great state of Pensylvania. I began to tire so I stopped at a rest stop in Somerset. As I was walking back to my car, I became a victim of a random act of violence. I was attacked by a group of Quaker Bodybuilding Women. I think that there was five or six of them, I couldn't tell because it was dark and they were beating me down. I managed to knock one of their Quaker hats off before they beat me into submission.
They stuffed me into the trunk of my car. I tried screaming for help but nobody heard me. I'm not sure how long I was in the trunk exactly because they were playing bad rap music really loud. The rap and the strong stench of oatmeal made me pass out.
They left me for dead, dumping me along the road near Moundsville, West Virginia. Fortunately, I was found by a group of Hari Krishnas, who were walking down the road. They took me to their village in the mountains. Here, I was nursed back to health and they tried to convert me. I felt well enough to then catch a bus home. Of course, this wasn't until after the test had been given in class."
Hehe.
I was driving in my car at about 3 AM early Friday morning. I was making my way through the great state of Pensylvania. I began to tire so I stopped at a rest stop in Somerset. As I was walking back to my car, I became a victim of a random act of violence. I was attacked by a group of Quaker Bodybuilding Women. I think that there was five or six of them, I couldn't tell because it was dark and they were beating me down. I managed to knock one of their Quaker hats off before they beat me into submission.
They stuffed me into the trunk of my car. I tried screaming for help but nobody heard me. I'm not sure how long I was in the trunk exactly because they were playing bad rap music really loud. The rap and the strong stench of oatmeal made me pass out.
They left me for dead, dumping me along the road near Moundsville, West Virginia. Fortunately, I was found by a group of Hari Krishnas, who were walking down the road. They took me to their village in the mountains. Here, I was nursed back to health and they tried to convert me. I felt well enough to then catch a bus home. Of course, this wasn't until after the test had been given in class."
Hehe.
Monday, July 07, 2003
Mmm.
The sun will be warm on my back; I'm headed West.
The sun will be warm on my back; I'm headed West.
"i dreamt i had one big tooth in my mouth. and it fell out and i used it as a hat. boy, i sure am weird."
Sunday, July 06, 2003
ShadowoftheDusk (11:26:01 PM): whoa...you have a birthday?
ShadowoftheDusk (11:26:09 PM): since when??
skye yes 681 (11:26:20 PM): since... nearly 17 years ago
ShadowoftheDusk (11:26:34 PM): hmm...
skye yes 681 (11:27:34 PM): will you come?
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:45 PM): perhaps
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:46 PM): (heh)
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:49 PM): if i can, yeah
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:54 PM): but you know, being the busy guy i am
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:59 PM): i might have prior engagements
skye yes 681 (11:28:53 PM): :/
skye yes 681 (11:28:56 PM): oh..
ShadowoftheDusk (11:29:15 PM): if i'm not there, you had better call the police
ShadowoftheDusk (11:29:17 PM): i might be dead
skye yes 681 (11:30:00 PM): hehe okay :)
ShadowoftheDusk (11:30:20 PM): i'm serious
ShadowoftheDusk (11:30:38 PM): and don't try to eat my corpse
skye yes 681 (11:31:16 PM): okay, it's a deal
ShadowoftheDusk (11:31:51 PM): hmm...for all i know, i will be your birthday dinner
ShadowoftheDusk (11:31:53 PM): crazy bitch
ShadowoftheDusk (11:26:09 PM): since when??
skye yes 681 (11:26:20 PM): since... nearly 17 years ago
ShadowoftheDusk (11:26:34 PM): hmm...
skye yes 681 (11:27:34 PM): will you come?
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:45 PM): perhaps
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:46 PM): (heh)
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:49 PM): if i can, yeah
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:54 PM): but you know, being the busy guy i am
ShadowoftheDusk (11:27:59 PM): i might have prior engagements
skye yes 681 (11:28:53 PM): :/
skye yes 681 (11:28:56 PM): oh..
ShadowoftheDusk (11:29:15 PM): if i'm not there, you had better call the police
ShadowoftheDusk (11:29:17 PM): i might be dead
skye yes 681 (11:30:00 PM): hehe okay :)
ShadowoftheDusk (11:30:20 PM): i'm serious
ShadowoftheDusk (11:30:38 PM): and don't try to eat my corpse
skye yes 681 (11:31:16 PM): okay, it's a deal
ShadowoftheDusk (11:31:51 PM): hmm...for all i know, i will be your birthday dinner
ShadowoftheDusk (11:31:53 PM): crazy bitch
I feel like a leaky faucet.
I feel like a giant blister.
I feel like an empty can.
I feel like a lazy cat.
I feel like a dirty floor.
I feel like a boiled lobster.
I feel like a missing link.
I feel like a birthday balloon.
Charles should be the President of the United States of America.
I'm wondering now what I ever did to deserve this easy life...this pleasnt neighborhood...these wonderful friends...this smile...
Yesterday when I was sweeping the fennec fox cage, one of them suddenly jumped out of its hole onto the floor with a "bang." I thought I was dying. I was sure something terrible was happening to me. I was the most scared I've ever been in my life; my whole body tingled. And then I realized what it must be like to be a fennec fox.
I feel like a giant blister.
I feel like an empty can.
I feel like a lazy cat.
I feel like a dirty floor.
I feel like a boiled lobster.
I feel like a missing link.
I feel like a birthday balloon.
Charles should be the President of the United States of America.
I'm wondering now what I ever did to deserve this easy life...this pleasnt neighborhood...these wonderful friends...this smile...
Yesterday when I was sweeping the fennec fox cage, one of them suddenly jumped out of its hole onto the floor with a "bang." I thought I was dying. I was sure something terrible was happening to me. I was the most scared I've ever been in my life; my whole body tingled. And then I realized what it must be like to be a fennec fox.
Friday, July 04, 2003
Sugar gliders: makers of the creepiest sound EVER.
Wednesday, July 02, 2003
Today was a great day. Nothing was different, really... Just more intense.
Andrew and I were in the car (I was driving), stopped at a red light. He leaned over and kissed my hand. An old black guy with crooked teeth in the car next to us shouted, "I see ya! I see ya! [we looked over at him] Ha ha! How ya doin'??" It made me laugh, and appreciate humanity more than I have in recent days. I think he was an angel. Some sort of divine messenger or something.
I was happier, and more on the verge of tears at any given moment from then on.
Other good stuff: Robert is coming back from Mexico, Care in the produce, quality time with Dad (and about fifty parallel parks), Six Feet Under, and artichoke sandwiches tomorrow at the zoo.
I miss you, Friends.
Andrew and I were in the car (I was driving), stopped at a red light. He leaned over and kissed my hand. An old black guy with crooked teeth in the car next to us shouted, "I see ya! I see ya! [we looked over at him] Ha ha! How ya doin'??" It made me laugh, and appreciate humanity more than I have in recent days. I think he was an angel. Some sort of divine messenger or something.
I was happier, and more on the verge of tears at any given moment from then on.
Other good stuff: Robert is coming back from Mexico, Care in the produce, quality time with Dad (and about fifty parallel parks), Six Feet Under, and artichoke sandwiches tomorrow at the zoo.
I miss you, Friends.
Tuesday, July 01, 2003
You're the only bee in my bonnet.
